How to not let people take you for granted

Do you feel like a victim? Do you think people take you for granted? Do you notice people don’t take you seriously? Do you think people talk and behave with you the way they want? If the answer to all of the above questions is “Yes”, then this article needs your attention. 

I had two of my friends who had this painful realization and started feeling like a victim. They were looking for solutions and wanted to do something which could help them handle situations and people. And during one such conversation, I was trying to help them and figured out that there is no need to fix people. All we have to do is work on a few changes within us, and everything will get settled on its own.

Things which we need to work on being confident, strong and dependable

1. Your dressing says a lot about you. Now, when I say this, I don’t mean that you need to wear branded stuff. I mean to say that your dressing should be neat and crisp. If you are wearing something for the office, don’t go too casual. And if you are going for informal meetings like get together etc., dress appropriately for the occasion.

A small check you can make for yourself before you pick an outfit is, ask yourself if you need to go to a nice restaurant wearing the same attire, would you be comfortable to go? If the answer is no, don’t pick that attire. People treat you the way you look, don’t forget it.

2. Don’t talk too much about yourself. Everyone does not need to know everything about you. Revealing too many details about yourself with put you in situations where you have to give explanations to people, might leave you stuck in situations where you don’t want to be in, and will make you look monotonous. 

There will be a point where you will have exhaust all the topics to bring up in a conversation, so try to pause and be a good listener as well. Also ensure you are not too loud while talking, or avoid offending anyone during your talks, or getting into meaningless discussions or dragging conversations and talking too much on any topic.

3. Keep yourself a bit reserved and don’t be available for everyone all the time. Being helpful is good, but you should be sure you should help when it’s needed. Your help will be valued when you help someone who is in real need of a helping hand; otherwise, people don’t tend to remember your support.

4. If you see some discussion going on in a group and you are passing by, or if you are around them, it’s not necessary to go and be part of that discussion. You can continue with what you are doing and remain out of it. If you get invited into the group, then you can join them. But avoid being present everywhere, especially where you are uncalled.

Try to read people, see and feel whether they want you or not in the situation. Your presence in that place where people don’t want you to be can give overwhelming feeling to those people.

5. Learn to enjoy your company how you enjoy being with others. Avoid spending too much time with anyone, which can make them feel overwhelmed by you. Keep your charm; if you meet someone, the person should be excited to see you and not look for excuses to run away from meeting you.

When you go to meet someone, there is energy in the air. You start your discussion and get engrossed into it. After some time you will see, you are thinking about what to talk. And you see the other person is also losing interest in the meeting. You need to stop talking and make a move much before this point. Doing this, you are keeping the excitement in the air for your next meeting.

6. Say no to too many favours from anyone. Taking benefits will trap you into obligations. You won’t be able to say no when the person who is doing favours asks you for any help. It weakens your image and makes you more dependent on others. Don’t let people assume you will do it anyhow if they are asking you something to do.

7. If anyone is talking disrespectfully, you need to cut the communication then and there. If You continue the discussion, it will give a message that you are ok with this behaviour.

If one time, a person behaves ill-mannered, and other time the person is acting in a soft tone that indicates the person is pretending to be good. A respectful person will never be rude, even when he is under stress.

8. If you have promised something, you need to fulfil it. If you don’t value your own words, expecting others to respect your talks, is illogical. If you promised that you would do something, complete the task well before time. If you are about to meet someone at a particular time, be there before time. All these steps will convey that you take others seriously, and you value your’s and their time. In return, you will receive the same kind of behaviour.

9. If someone has confided in you and told you a secret, that does not mean you go and tell it to your best friend. It would be best if you kept it as a secret, undisclosed, this conveys that you are dependable and trustworthy.

Life is all about learning new things in us and simultaneously improving things which we already know. These points will help you become the person you desire. Will help you feel proud, stay powerful, and happy in any situation with different kinds of people around you.